Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Dreams and "Say Say"

I got to see her last night. I am so thankful the Lord has allowed her to come visit me in my dreams. So far they have all been in the context of knowing that she has been to heaven and is only back to visit for a little while.

So last night, she looked like her healthy, pre-cancer self. I can't remember where we were, but she was sitting. In this dream I knew that I had been with her for a couple of hours, although I can't recall what all we had been doing together. But then I finally remembered, she's been in heaven for over a month now! I've got to ask her about heaven! So I did. I asked her what Jesus looked like. I asked her if He had scars on his hands. And I asked her who greeted her when she got there. The only answer I remember her telling me is that yes, Jesus does have scars on his hands! (check out John 20:24-29) How beautiful! My mom has seen our Savior face-to-face. She has seen the scars that He bears in remembrance of the sacrifice He made on our behalf. The scars to remind us that we have been bought with a price.

A couple nights ago I dreamed that her hair had grown back, and she wasn't sure how she liked it. She was debating if she was going to cut it or not. This is entirely accurate of who she was before she got sick.

I am thankful the Lord is allowing my memory of her to switch back to who she was before cancer - to who she really is - to the Mom I knew and loved with all my heart my whole life.

In one dream, I hugged her. She didn't say anything. She just sat there and smiled at me and let me hug her. Her smile simply said, "I love you." I know that's what she was saying to me with her eyes and with that big beautiful smile.

She texted me once. I looked down at my phone and on the message preview I saw that is was from "Mom" and all she said were those precious three words... "I love you." Oh! How I miss being able to text and call her. I cherish that dream. Something as simple as a text message...

In another dream I remember asking her, "Mom, so you've been in heaven a day and a half now. What's it like?" The only thing I remember her telling me was that she started singing "Say Say" and everyone joined in with her. She said it was beautiful.

"Say Say" is a song by Kristian Stanfill that Tony and Hudson (my now 3 and half year old nephew) would always, and I mean always, drum to! What's really crazy about this dream I had, is that the next day my family and I had to meet at the funeral home for something. Bryan and Jenna told me that on the way to the funeral home, Hudson was looking out the window and he said, "I see G-ma in the sky!" They asked him what G-ma was doing. He said that she was dancing and singing. Well, guess what song he said she was singing?..... Yep, "Say Say". I about fell on the floor when they told me about this considering the dream I had the night before. I have no idea what God allows little children to see and experience - but I don't doubt for a second what Hudson said he saw. I know my momma is up there dancing with the angels singing "Say Say" and I can't wait to get up there and join her!

So, now I find it very appropriate to share with you the song Mom has been singing in heaven, "Say Say". And in honor of her and our King Jesus, I invite you to crank up the volume a little bit, let loose and jam out - because I'm sure that's exactly what she has been doing, and who knows, maybe she'll join in unison with you while you listen and sing :)

JESUS IS KING!

"This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it."

16 comments:

  1. Awesome post!! I'm glad you shared this.

    My grandma {my mom's mom} has been in Heaven for 8 years now. Right after she passed I had dreams about her. It was like she was really there. She never said anything, she smiled and she didn't have her oxygen on. It was the craziest thing. It was like God was telling me....it's okay. It helped for me to see her in my dreams. Perfect and healthy again.

    That's awesome about your nephew saying he saw your mom. God is a-m-a-z-i-n-g, isn't he?!

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    1. Yes, He really is! Such a blessing to visit them in our dreams :)

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  2. Tears of joy that God has blessed you with these sweet reassurances.

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  3. I wish there were words to easy your pain, my heart hurts for you.

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    1. Thanks, Gail. I know the Lord is the only One who can bring true comfort.

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  4. All of this is just totally awesome!! Here's wishing you more dreams like this...I'm smiling for you!

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  5. Jordan, I started reading your blog after reading about your mom on Kellys Korner. It's been one year since my mother in law passed away suddenly and very unexpectedly. I find comfort in your words and wanted to say thank you for being open about grief, it's often a topic that people shy away from. My 4 year old niece has said on many occasions that Nana has come to see her in her sleep and that Nana has said to her that she loves us. It's bizarre to hear a young child tell these stories but I believe God can do anything so I believe what she says. Thanks for writing.

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    1. That's so cool that your niece has been having those dreams! I would definitely believe them too :)

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  6. I don't know you or your family, but I was a long-time reader of your Mom's blog. I am so sorry for your loss.

    My Mom died suddenly 15 years ago. I know she's in Heaven, but I really miss her...even after all this time. The grief isn't as intense, but the longer time goes on, the more stuff she's missed. I mean, she's not missing us...WE are missing HER. :) I have never dreamed about her...well, there was maybe one time. One of my sisters, on the other hand, has "seen" my Mom in her dreams often...especially in the first years after her death. I was so sad that God did not allow that for me, but I know it's all for my best and His glory. I think it's precious that you've been able to "see" your Mom, and for the comfort that brings to you. God is everywhere and He can do everything...and use anything. Blessings to you as you walk through the grieving process.

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  7. Oh this post made me so happy with you! Little bits of joy . . answers to prayer! xoxo

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  8. After my grandma died 2 years ago I had a dream that she was with us, my whole extended family, and she was young again. Younger than she was during my lifetime, probably in her 30s or 40s, wearing a dress from the 1960s with her hair (not gray anymore) in the style she had in all the old photos of her from that era. She was with my grandpa, who died about 15 years ago. The whole family sat down at a long table, and my grandparents were across from me but next to my cousin Jody, who had been raised by them. My grandpa didn't speak at all, but my grandma said "I'm with Jody right now, but I'm here." I asked her if she was young again and she nodded and started to cry.

    I don't follow the same religion you do, but I KNOW that these dreams are real. Our loved ones come to us in our dreams.

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    1. Such a neat dream! Thanks for sharing, Erin. And I also don't follow a religion. I simply follow Jesus :)

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